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STFU, Weather Guy

According to the local news, which is attempting to be a) witty and b) topical, we have had one Bieber of snow so far this month. Yes, that's correct: they have chosen to measure the snow in Biebers. Actually that's out of date, because we've now had 70", so if little 5'5" Justin were to stand in it he would be totally buried.

Perhaps not a bad thing. Justin, would you care to step over here for a moment?

And they've published a helpful little graph showing snowfall for previous Decembers. There's the average snowfall (a gentle orange curve up to about 2' over the whole month); the least snow (a lean green line that clings to the bottom of the graph); the most snow (a blue line that goes upward in three or four hiccups to about 6' over the course of the entire month). And then there's this year: a purple line that shoots vertically up on the 6th and then just...stays there, smushed against the top like a helium balloon bobbing against the ceiling. Argh. Apparently the only worse events were the notorious Blizzard of '66 and the infamous Blizzard of '93 (42" in 48 hours!!).

On the plus side, all the Christmas shopping for out-of-staters is done and shipped (go me!). Now I can sit back and look forward to the annual Christmas Eve White Elephant party in which someone always gets the following a) a chia pet, b) something obscene from Spencers, and c) that really ugly mirror that keeps getting regifted. I do not enjoy this sort of thing (I don't even need any ACTUAL stuff, why would I want to acquire gag stuff??), but it's part of my (step)mother-in-law's family tradition, so there you go. There's usually nothing for me to eat other than the rye bread dip and deviled eggs, everything else being meat-based products. Ah well, there's always the vodka jello shots in the ice cube trays...

Ooh, it's 11 degrees out. Time for tea.

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